Defending Yourself Against a Narcissist

Fighting Back Against Dirty Tricks

Trying to get a divorce from a narcissist may be even more difficult than staying married to one. It’s pervasive for a narcissist to engage in dirty tactics to try and make your life a living nightmare throughout the divorce. However, you can take steps to protect yourself throughout the process.

Expect the Unexpected

While this might sound a bit cliche, you never know what a narcissist might try during a divorce. They may keep things simple and raise arguments at every chance, or they might take a dirtier route and try smearing your name through the mud with outlandish lies. It’s important to walk into a divorce with the expectation that something may go unplanned, and that mindset can help you deal with those moments.

Set Clear Boundaries

One of a narcissist’s favorite tactics is to steamroll others to get what they want, and often, they may not let up until they achieve their goal. Setting and maintaining clear boundaries of what you will and will not do can help if your spouse decides to take this route.

No matter how much they bombard you with communication, you do not have to respond to texts or phone calls immediately. If things begin to get really out of hand, refer to court orders.

Don’t Engage in Self-Defense

This might sound counterintuitive, but narcissists love to attack whenever they are presented with the opportunity. By trying to defend yourself against their random, baseless attacks on you, you provide them with further opportunities to pull you down. Rather than engaging them, stick to the facts of the case and avoid meaningless arguments about other items.

Document Everything

This is important: your ex might lie about their financial records or other aspects of the divorce. It’s important that you try to obtain forms of documentation to prove that they are lying. Not only does it illuminate the truth, but it could also benefit the final divorce agreement.

Consult With Your Attorney

Perhaps one of the most critical pieces of advice is to keep your divorce attorney on hand in case something goes awry. Your attorney can help you strategize a plan to protect yourself against the attacks of your narcissistic spouse and can navigate you through each step of the legal process.

At Drexler Law, we know that dealing with a narcissist can be incredibly challenging and leave you feeling exhausted. We are here to help you protect against their attacks as you plan your next chapter.